These days a lot passes for normal and then a lot does not. Who is exactly in charge of deciding on what is or is not normal? Me for myself, you for yourself and so on.
Whenever I hear someone telling me what is normal I have a visceral reaction. The one that gives me physical rash. Unlike all of those entitled to impose their version of ‘normal’ I’m fully aware that my ‘normal’ is not everyone’s ‘normal’. It is ok!
Growing up I realized my version of normal doesn’t seam to align with the versions of people around me. First, obviously, I noticed it within my biological family. To this day I’m grateful to my mother for not making me do any of the things she noticed I had no interest in but were nonetheless considered ‘normal’. Keep in mind I grew up in a socialist country where there were ‘rules and regulations’ and everyone was expected to follow the templet. Than add religion to the mix…Mon Dieu!
My mom made choirs optional: what I was ok with doing I did and things I to this day have no interest she did not insist on. I know her family and husband ( who did absolutely nothing to contribute to family or society in large) gave her grief about it, so that makes me even more grateful. We all had washing machine at home ( if you’re a millennial or older and lived in Europe you know that was ‘normal’). Never have I ever turned it on. These machines had programs and to me it always looked like breaking into a safe. Unlike good old American ones: hot/cold, on/off! Hence I never did laundry. However I did like to iron, found it very calming, but I wasn’t and still am not really good at it. So I’d iron sheets, towels and other things that were fool proof and even I couldn’t ruin. I knew I never wanted to have children at a very young age. Once I said it out loud in a conversation and everyone in the room got on my case because it’s not ‘normal’. My mother is gifted with some serious superpowers: you name it she can do it. All my cousins love her and now their children as well because she’s just natural at…everything. That domestic gene skipped me entirely: I have my laundry done, my food delivered , mani/pedi done on regular basis, the list truly goes on. As for other people I’ve always respected other’s version of what normal is ( unless they tried to ‘convert’ me in any shape, way or form) even if it clashed with mine.
In case someone tries to shame you and your normal: thank them for their unwanted opinion and tell them to keep it to themselves! As long as your normal doesn’t hurt anyone in any way, you just do you, my fellow misfits.
*** ‘Read my mind’ by The Killers